LETTER TO THE EDITOR: A Plea for Goodwill for the Priest at Center of Conflict over Staff Firing

Letter to the Editor:

My name is Christine Amara. I'm a mom here in Westwood, a parishioner at St. Margaret Mary (now St. Joan of Arc), with one daughter in faith formation there and another in faith formation at St. Timothy's in Norwood.

Over the summer, when driving in a car with my friend and her 7-year old son, an ambulance passed us with flashing lights. My 8-year daughter said, "Mom, let's pray. Ms. Duffy told us to say three Hail Mary's when an ambulance or fire truck passes." And so we did, and loudly. Although I personally felt uncomfortable as I don't normally pray mid-conversation, outloud, in a car with friends, I was inspired by my daughter's confidence in practicing and preaching her faith. This is Ms. Duffy's doing. Ms. Duffy is an icon. She showed kids it was "cool" to be Catholic. Kindergartners through college students are equally eager to run up to her and say hello when they see her around town. Her love for God is infectious.

I was heartbroken to learn of Ms. Duffy's termination. I witnessed the ways in which Ms. Duffy gave every bit of herself to the Westwood Catholic Community. I can't imagine how she must be feeling right now. I was also heartbroken to read the postings on the Westwood Bulletin Board. While it is heartwarming to see folks rallying around and expressing gratitude to someone who has been instrumental in their lives, specifically their faith lives; it hurts to see so much negativity and disdain toward Catholics, Christians and the Church.

From my own personal and professional experiences, I know many times that there are two very different sides of the same story. That even with the best intent to tell one's narrative truthfully and authentically, perspectives can be different. That two people can both be right (and sometimes also wrong). I don't purport to have any details or imply anything about right or wrong in this situation (nor would or should I be the judge of that); my comment is just a general observation from disagreements I've been privy to as a third party. I've also seen employers not comment on personnel decisions, without intending to imply that a terminated employee has done anything nefarious.

I met Father Matt over the summer in Roche Brothers, when we physically bumped into each other reaching for the same avocado. My younger daughter had just finished up her third year of preschool at Temple Beth David, and I was eager to share some of the great faith-based initiatives and traditions I had witnessed as part of the Temple Beth David community, in hopes of fostering something similar within the Westwood Catholic Parishes. I am interested in helping our Westwood Catholic Parishes be more welcoming, more present in the community and bringing people in (to God, but also to one another). I found Fr. Matt to be immediately receptive and open. He took my contact information and followed up with me that same day.

Myself and a handful of other Westwood moms have had two meetings with Fr. Matt since then in furtherance of this community engagement goal. We've brainstormed ideas across an array of areas, from service projects, community events, parish projects and ways to foster friendships among kids within the parish. In both of these meetings, I again found Fr. Matt was willing to explore ideas, be flexible and most of all, seemed genuine and sincere in his desire for the parish to thrive.

I don't think I will ever know the full story behind Ms. Duffy's termination, but I do hope that this is not the downfall of our parish. After my initial two weeks of texting in outrage with friends over what could have happened to our beloved Ms. Duffy, I've spent a lot of time since this Sunday thinking about how I can personally fulfill my call as a Catholic to be a peacemaker. In Disney's Frozen, Anna decides when she isn't sure of what step to take next, that she'll do "the next right thing." The movie isn't really clear on how one determines what the next right thing is, but for me, I thought mine was to speak up. First, to offer some defense or at least plea for goodwill and compassion for Fr. Matt (who is less than 6 months in a new job, in a new town, and I would guess constrained by some form of internal policies from sharing his perspective in any meaningful way). I also don't imagine that it's particularly easy to be a priest in today's current culture, the cards are stacked against him--- yet we need priests, and from my experiences with him, he's really trying. Secondly, I wanted to speak up in hopes that maybe someone else is feeling like me -- sad... but wanting to make things better. Right now, while we have what seems like an overwhelming amount of attention on our parish, can we use it to create something good? Can we come together to do something positive for our community? Please reach out to me if you would like to work together.

Christine

Thanks to Christine Amara, for contributing these comments to Westwood Minute. Ms. Amara was a parishioner of Westwood's St. Margaret Mary parish, which following a merger with Westwood's St. Denis, is now named St. Joan of Arc. She has one daughter in faith formation at St. Joan of Arc and another in faith formation at St. Timothy's in Norwood.

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